On Pants and Containers

This has absolutely nothing to do with what I want to talk about today…but I am currently, rightthisverysecond, listening in on a conversation between two ladies in my office. Hey, it’s Cubeland. You can hear everything. What do you expect me to do? Plug my ears singing “LALALALALALALAAAAA” just to prevent feeling like a creepy eavesdropper? Well, simply put, I refuse. That would just be silly. Then their conversation would turn to me and they’d start talking about what a wierd-o I was, and why in the world do their cubes have to be nestled next to The Crazy Girl’s cube and THEN it would just turn into a huge headache for our bosses because they’d go straight to their offices requesting to be moved because they just cannot possibly get any work done with such a racket going on. So, you see? I’m really saving my boss a massive amount of hastle, by listening in. I’m doing a public service, really. No, no, You don’t have to thank me. I’m just selfless that way.

Now, where was I?

Oh yes. Their conversation which, incidentally, has since transitioned…but whatever. They were talking about women’s pants and the lengths that frequently cause quite a bit of hand-wringing. The Short (or petite) pants fit almost perfectly in the store, if you’re planning on wearing flats. But the second you add any kind of heal to that ensemble, the pants immediately make you look like you’re prepared for a flood. Which is so two decades ago. And the Regulars jump up in length so much that they drag on the floor even while wearing high heels. The second woman expressed the exact same problem, but with the Regular vs. Long legths. And, I mean, the Short vs. Regular thing? SO MY PROBLEM. Buying pants is a gargantuan headache because I am so very limited on what kinds of shoes I can wear with them, depending on the poison I choose. And according to the many times that I’ve heard this problem complained about, I don’t understand why clothing designers don’t get on board with offering a wider variety of lengths for women’s pants. I say they offer Short, Shorter, Shortest and Long, Longer, Longest. The Short and the Long would be closest to the Regular length, the Shorter and the Longer would be a healthy in between on their respective end of the spectrum, and the Shortest and the Longest would be hanging out on the ends. It’s brilliant. It will prevent gnashing of teeth across the globe!

Now! To the topic of the day! I think I may have actually found my own personal heaven. Here on earth, that is. I stumbled upon it in my search for gift wrapping ideas for Christmas. In the pursuit of budgeting our way through the holidays (CHRISTMAS, especially) (I say ‘holidays’ because it is the perfect, broad-brush-stroke term to cover the myriad of events from Halloween to Christmas. Not at all because of any politically correct crap. Do you want to know why you celebrate December 25th? The original reason you celebrate it?  It is because Christ – Son of God and Son of Man – came to earth to live amoung us and eventually fulfill his Father’s will. FULL STOP.) (Woo! Soap box? Anyone?), we’ve decided to give gifts that I can make. And because I love to spoil people and am terribly worried that someone will get the idea that we didn’t want to spend more money on them, I’ve been desperately trying to figure out how to present these gifts in such an appealing way that the uhm, low overall cost, will be the furthest thing from anyone’s mind.

And that search gloriously led me to The Container Store. I mean, holy cow, I don’t think I’ve ever been so distracted in my life! This is like every OCD and/or Type A person’s Paradise! Containers and Organization and Shelving and Gift Wrap and Packing and Moving and ohmyword I don’t think I’ve ever been so delighted by a website! I may not be showing Dorian my order before I place it…because uuhhh, there may be a lot on it. And I can already tell you that my response to his scoldy look, exasperated sigh, and exclamation of ”Honey…do you really need all of these things?” will be, “OF COURSE I DO! EVERY SINGLE ITEM IS ABSOLUTELY, BEYOND NECESSARY FOR MY ABILITY TO SURVIVE!” And I’ll win and we will just be forced to eat less next month. See? Win-win. Tony Horton would probably condone, nay, ENCOURAGE my purchases! Now I want to make sure that we’re giving presents to as many people as possible just to have more excuses to find more cute containers. Because The Container Store has got them! It absolutely delivers on it’s title.

You should go to that website. Join me in basking in the organizational wonder that it is. I promise you will not be disappointed.